Fiorello: What does this say here? This thing here.
Otis P. Driftwood: Oh, that? Oh, that's the usual clause. That's in every contract. That just says uh, it says uh, "If any of the parties participating in this contract is shown not to be in their right mind, the entire agreement is automatically nullified."
Fiorello: Well, I don't know...
Driftwood: It's all right, that's, that's in every contract. That's, that's what they call a "sanity clause."
Fiorello: Ha ha ha ha ha! You can't fool me. There ain't no Sanity Claus.
14 comments:
Siren, Here are a few lousy limericks I wrote to help offset all the the holiday chintzy tinsel. Enjoy!
Too many cookies is a sugar shocker
Mrs. Claus is off her rocker
Santa's weight
Is far too great
And his pacemaker's a real tick-tocker
One X-mas season was not quiet
When Santa's helpers had a riot
Elves ate all the lolipops
Then they trashed the toy workshops
Twas the last year of the north pole diet
Deck us all with boughs of holly
Let's sniff some glue and get jolly
When we meet up in St. Louie
Christmas is a lotta hooey
'cause you get run down by the trolley!
OMG, classic. I was never a great limerick composer so I admire the knack in others.
You may get a chuckle from the article about Christmas albums by Jewish singers and musicians at www.jewsrock.org. Maybe Santa will get you a region free DVD player so you can see the Hong Kong epic "Land of Many Perfumes".
Happy holidays, Siren!
Surlyh, a round of applause for you! What a great limerick.
Happy holidays, dear F! I hope that your weekend is wonderful.
Just dropping in to wish you a merry Christmas - love the Marx Bros post :)
And surlyh has my undying admiration - those are great.
Nothing inspires a Christmas ham like an audience. Let me know when I've gone too far!
Fat Santa is rotund of girth
Lousy with frankincense and mirth
That jolly tub
Does wrong way rub
Let's plant him six feet under earth
How will Saint Nick get R. I. P.?
Fall to his death from roof icy?
Or will he expire
In chimney fire
Or be hung with care from Christmas tree?
surlyh makes a foray into 'fumes with that frankincense and myrrh one! What skill! And Happy Holidays to you, fragrant film buff! xoxo
Surly, you put that fragrance ref in that lyric just for me! Admit it. I'm touched.
Happy Holidays to you too, dear M.!
"Outside of a dog, a book is a man's best friend.inside of a dog, it's too dark to read."
--Groucho
Merry Christmas one and all
Stop me please. This one's for the Siren:
In Christmas season smells climb the stair
The scents of memories fill the air
The pine, the spruce
The dinner goose
The fireplace and Santa, burning there
Nooooo! Surly, you said the "g" word!
Mr. Campaspe talked me into cooking a goose for Christmas Eve. Let me tell you, there's a reason turkey is more popular. If the goose is getting fat it's because it then sheds all the fat while cooking, and you wind up with the baster again & again siphoning the stuff off so it won't taste greasy. Quelle freaking pain.
If he doesn't want turkey next year, fine, we'll have halibut or something.
My Czech grandmother made us goose. The gravy for the dumplings was the clear fat in the pan. This was before Columbus discovered cholesterol.
For most, turkey is the bird of choice
It's meaty and if done right, moist
Some prefer duck for taste
But beware a goose to baste
A curse onto the cook you foist
Or...You'll soon raise your non-xmas voice
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